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Depression creeping back in

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Hunter2 View Drop Down
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Joined: 23/October/2003
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    Posted: 10/March/2006 at 11:16am
Ughhh
Do any of you ever feel like you have just had enough. I am at my wits end and have only been applying for jobs for a few months. NOTHING ZIP NADA ZILCH.
Literally two to three jobs a week and I can already feel the esteem dwindling. How am I even going to begin to pay this back if I can even get a job?
My husband and I are on the outs again.
Student loans are calling again.
Collections are on my case again.
My health has been in the crapper again.
This debt of doom just looms and is waiting to descend and its a dark cloud that there is no way around. Man I wish I had never even heard of student loans. I have totally blown it.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote administrator Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 10/March/2006 at 5:49pm
Lets try to help here... perhaps a job finding club would be of help.


You will get a job, and you will be able to pay it back. Anytime you doubt yourself just tell yourself that I told you so.

You havent totally blown it... your just in a set of circumstances that alot of people find themselves in ... its not your fault.

This too will pass!

and you have this site for support!

Mark
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Mark O'Meara

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old hippy View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote old hippy Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 11/March/2006 at 6:01am

Hunter, I can certainly empathize with you in your job hunting endeavours. Years ago... if you wanted a job, you just went out and got one...not anymore.  I stayed in school part-time for 10 years, looking for employment the whole time I was there, knowing I was running up a huge student loan...it was either that or welfare.  The only work I could find were the student jobs every year.  So I stayed in school, because as you've noticed - no job, no self-esteem.  What a vicious circle...but I did pick up an education.

Sure enough...every time I attempted to leave the school - I ended up applying for welfare.  I graduated twice and had to apply for welfare 6 mths. later (both times).  Didn't have the option of moving back home....and I had to eat. 

Of course I became depressed, but turned it into anger, which is more energizing.  I took a few practical computer courses at the adult education center (for free - how ironic is that?).  Then I went to the temp agencies, which abound.  Many of them are American strangely enough and they do take some of your paycheque for finding you work, but it's better than nothing, and you can gain work experience and sometimes references which are so valuable. 

The job finding clubs are a good idea too.  They offer support with group or individual counselling, help and ideas with resumes, job applications, etc.  Someplace to go when you want to get out of the house.  I'm certainly no success story but 5 years of IR and temp jobs and I'm working at a better paying and more challenging job now - although it's a contract position.  I'll be facing the DR hurdle next....

Anyways, cheer up and know that it's not you.  There's something wierd going on these days.  I mean, why can't a person just go out and get a job if they want to work?  Too easy I guess...

S.

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Hunter2 View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Hunter2 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 11/March/2006 at 3:05pm
Mark...Thanks
I know in my head defeatist statements do not help make the situation better. I know in my head its just depression talking. But...knowing does not really help. Honestly, I cannot see how I will pay this ALL back. Even if I paid five hundred dollars a month every month for the next twenty five years it would still not pay it off after accruing interest. I just cannot see how this is going to work and it feels futile. How will I ever make enough money? I have tried to look at this from a few angles and cannot see how.

I appreciate the support. I know this "down" feeling will pass but its overwhelming at times and this is one of them.
Old Hippy, Thank You for all your great ideas. When my daughter gets older temp work would be great avenue for building my resume. Unfortunately child care makes a full time job necessary for right now. I have interviewed in my area and there are minimal child care spaces available for full time and none for part time(a situation exacerbated by the god awful conservatives).

I apply for EVERY government job that comes down the pike...and never get past the wait list...not once in the last year. One would think they would WANT to hire me so they can get paid...my guess is my "enhanced reliability" (ie credit check) is making me seem...undesirable. Anyway, maybe someone will give me a chance. I do have an education, have picked up some marketable skills doing (unpaid) work at home for my dad and husbands businesses. Eventually I will work. I just have to keep telling myself that. I had a collection agent ask me the other day "Why don't you move to Alberta if you cannot get a job in SK" Yep I will get right on that......

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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote administrator Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 11/March/2006 at 3:54pm
I'd strongly recommend a job club... that way you can get some support and feedback. maybe there is something in your resume design that is holding you back... maybe you arent presenting yourself in the best way.

For example, I had a student submit the following resume.

Employment History:
ABC Taxi
Set up networks and call database.

McDonalds
As part of a team, set up sales network infrastructure.

He got nowhere because everyone saw assumed taxi driver, and sales person at mcdonalds. He was an IT specialist!

A slight change to:

Network Specialist
ABC Taxi.
Description was the same

Network Installation and Maintenance
McDonalds Corp
description was the same....


made all the difference and he got interviews and offers after the next round of resumes were sent out. You'll get this kind of support and feedback in a job club...

and as for paying off the student loan, who knows what rules will be in place in a few years when the wealthy baby boomer politicians are turfed out and replaced by a younger generation that knows the debt problems we've been through!

Mark
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Hunter2 View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Hunter2 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 13/March/2006 at 6:50am
Mark
I appreciate that. Thank You. My resume seems to get me through the door so I think its ok..usually. I tailor it to each job I am applying for making sure skills for that position are highlighted and illustrated by work experience. I will check into job clubs and see what pointers I can work into my applications.
As far as interviews go, it use to be a strong point, but it could be a weak area now. My confidence is kaput and I sometimes come across as giddy.

For most of the jobs I apply for, because they are governmental, there is usually a test, then if the mark is high enough another test, than an interview and a mock customer service drill, then the "enhanced reliability check" which can include credit. There have been three positions in the last round of applications I have been waitlisted for. That being said I have been on a waitlist for two federal government jobs until they actually ran out and never got a call. I do not have any criminal issues so what that says to me is that all things being equal the HR managers think "why employ a credit risk? "

Its a viscous cycle because every job I get interviewed for and then waitlisted for is like another "not good enough" and sends the esteem down for the next round. Taking rejection has never been a strong suit and added to the "how will I ever pay this" stress its no wonder depression takes a toll.


It is true about the boomers, perhaps it will make a difference. I hope it does.

It sure is nice to have this board its a form of security and a wealth of information. This is the only place I can vent about these issues where people actually get it and have constructive advice.

Thanks Mark
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