Hi,
Today I had my first encounter with Collectcorp. I have some outstanding debt on a student loan from TD, and am unable to make the payments due to the fact that I am on disability. I also had federal and provincial student loans but, fortunately, the government recognized my inability to pay and forgave those loans.
I got my first letter from Collectcorp last week. I called today to propose a payment plan that would work for me. I explained that I was on disability and was unable to pay what they were expecting and that the government had forgiven my loans, etc. I was asked why I couldn't work, so I explained that I was primarily on disability due to severe post-traumatic-stress disorder.
She asked if I had a computer, I replied "yes". She said, well then why don't you just get a job on the internet and work at home? I explained that if I were able to work on the internet, I would not be on disability. Her tone of voice was becoming very loud and hostile, as she continued to lecture me about my responsibilities, etc.
At this point she is practically yelling at me, so I tell her I think her attitude is very disrespectful and unprofessional, and that I would like to discuss the matter with someone else. She became furious and started spouting off about how she is not disrespecting me, this is what she was hired to do, etc. So I state very firmly that I would not be discussing this with her and that I would like to speak with her manager or supervisor.
She reluctantly puts someone else on the line. I ask this woman if she is the manager, she replies "no", so I ask to speak to one. She says we will see what the problem is first. She then begins trying to discuss my loan. I cut her off, saying "Wait, first I would like to talk to someone about how rudely I was treated by the previous operator." She replies that she had listened to our entire conversation and that she had in no way acted out of line.
She then started asking why I couldn't pay the loan. I explain that I am on disability, to which she replies "We have people on welfare who are paying off their loans so that is no excuse." I explain to her that I have substantial out-of-pocket medical expenses and I am raising a child.
She says, you're disability payments come from the government (I have Person's with Disabilities Status through Emplyment and Income Asssistance) , so they have to cover all your medical expenses. I explain that I am using medicinal marijuana and that the governement does not cover that.
She then begins to accuse me of being a neglectful mother, insinuating that I put my medical needs above the needs of my child. "So, you smoke your weed and who takes care of the kid.?" I remind her that medicinal marijuana is perfectly legal in Canada, and that my PWD designation means that I get a little extra money (above regular welfare rates) to pay for costs associated with my disability that the government doesn't cover. I also tell her that referring to the self-administration of my medication as "smoking my weed" is highly unprofessional.
She tells me that there are medicines I can take that the government will cover, and so I tell her that I used these medicines and that (due to side-effects) I could barely function. "Oh", she says very sarcastically "Now I am confused. You could barely function but you managed to raise a child?" At this point I explain how I had some help, etc. She starts saying how it all sounds like a big excuse to her and how she "got off HER butt" (her exact words) and got a job and took responsibility.
I asked her if SHE had been raped and tortured for 4 years (the reason I have PTSD, I was brutally physically and sexually assaulted for a period of nearly 4 years). She says, "No, but we all have our problems and I take responsibility for mine. I would go on the medications that are covered so I could pay off my loans." I explain to her the she cannot say what SHE would do in my situation unless SHE has walked a mile in MY shoes and that she would do whatever it took to get healthy so she could take the best possible care of her child. She disagreed.
I realized that I was just disrespecting myself by allowing them to speak to me like this, so I told them to take me to court (I have done my research and the worst they can do is take me to court where the judge will set up a payment plan that I actually can afford). I then hung up.
I was just so shaken by the experience and kind of mad at myself for wasting my time trying to justify my life. I am an awesome person! I have literally survived hell at the hands of a psychopath, and instead of killing myself, or becoming an addict, I took the little energy I had and did what was truly important. Be an EXCELLENT mom to my daughter.
Yes, the government has supported me, but I have always made sure all her needs were met, and, talking to her, you would never realize she was raised by someone, who at some points was having about 100 physical flashbacks of rape, or 10-20 panic attacks a day, or was so afraid of people I hardly left my home for a year. She is an amazing, highly gifted, extremely well-cared for child and I have made it my top priority to ensure she receives the highest standard of care, despite my challenges.
Many people who have been through less than I have totally fallen apart and could not handle their duties as a parent, but out deep love for my little girl, I keep getting up out of bed and pressing on, even though many days felt like pulling teeth. And I did it all as a single mom with little help. How dare they call ME irresponsible!
I have picked up a completely shattered life and am turning it around into something meaningful and beautiful. No this does not yet involve supporting myself financially at this point, but so what?! I am going far above and beyond what any sane person who knows what I have endured would expect of me.
Despite my anger, my heart goes out to these two women. I can tell by the lack of compassion and empathy they showed me, that THEY have been judged harshly. It is evident that they have accepted and internalized such judgements or they would not have shown such hostility, nor chosen a field that is so inherently negative and stressful. If they truly loved themselves, they would not unconsciously seek out such modes of self-punishment, but instead would be doing something fulfilling that they enjoy.
Instead of calling them every name in the book as I am so tempted, I send these ladies love and forgiveness, and highest hopes that they will come to realize their magnificence and release the pain. Then they will be able to look at someone like me, and see the magnificence there, too.
I will do what I need to preserve my dignity, respect me rights, and do what I can to prevent them from treating anyone else this way. This will involve reporting this incident to their superiors, as well as appropriate authorities (BTW: If anyone reading this has any info on whom I can report this to, let me know), as well as working with advocacy access (1-800-663-1278, for anyone in BC on disability in this situation), but as for the two ladies I forgive them and release them with love for healing, for I know they would not attack and hurt me, if they had not been attacked and hurt themselves.
Just as they can never know what they would do in my situation unless they walked a mile in my shoes, I haven't walked a mile in their shoes, either, and perhaps I would do the same.
Despite being abused so severely, I am able to love and forgive and to understand. But it has taken WORK. Maybe not the kind you get money or recognition for, but really, REALLY hard work. I hope they are willing to do the work they need to in order to genuinely love themselves and others because the payoff is worth infinite times more than all the money and recognition in the universe!
My advice to anyone dealing with Collectcorp, don't sacrifice your self respect as I did. Don't answer any personal questions such as what medications you take, why you are on disablility, how you care for your children, etc. And don't let they're bullying hurt you. The level of respect that anyone shows you is nothing more than a reflection of the level of respect they feel they deserve. They are hurting. Whole, emotionally balanced people do not treat others in such a way. I would even go so far as to say that whole, emotionally balanced people do not work for collection agencies, lol!
All the Best and Happy Holidays!
-Tanya