I had the best of intentions, however, the student loan system did not or could not see that.  I found myself in distress, economically, physically and emotionally.  I had not failed at much up until that point in my life.  I was on disability overwhelmed by insecurity, failure, and without hope or a path out of my economic predicament.  Thank goodness for Mark allowing John to post to the website.  I took the chance of contacting John, unsure of who is was or whether I could trust someone I had never met.  I was already feeling victimized by an uncaring system.  When speaking to John, he had the “bigger picture” in mind.  He saw my potential, how I was an honest victim of the system, and offered hope.  He also said that I would have to be patient as there are not always quick remedies.

While I heard that I would sometimes allow my fear and insecurity of the unknown creep into my mind.  I couldn’t always think logically about an experience that wore my self-esteem down.  When one can’t think logically or see the bigger picture, fear creeps in and I would email John.  He always steered me back and said that I was fine. There was a bigger picture and that I was fine.

With time, I was able to go back to work.  With the safety net John provided, the fears lessened.  However, I would find myself questioning the path because of the immense stress and failure the system created in the mind of myself and the other young Canadians who cannot cope.  This was not John’s fault, rather the residual toxic effects of the process the system has setup.  Again, when one is rebuilding their confidence and self-esteem, any bump can make one question the path they are on.  John always guided me back. 

I have received national recognition for my work and awards.  Others have benefitted from this.  John’s guidance through the years allowed this to happen.  He was the only one who saw my story and potential and lifted me up.  Yes, I also had to work hard to achieve this but John provided a strong foundation which, if I did not have, I could not have ever achieved anything.  John repaired my life.

I am not perfect, nor is anyone.  There are still residual scars of the system on me.  However, I don’t know where I’d be if it hadn’t been for John.  Just recently, John helped me to navigate an imposing obstacle in my path.  He did so with confidence, humour and humility. 

In closing, having known John since 2003, having never met, and being separated my several provinces, I was initially hesitant.   He has not steered me wrong sinc e then.  He has put in many years and much time helping me get to where I am.  There are no words that I can choose to adequately thank him.  He saved my life and career.  He gave me hope where none existed.